Blog posts tagged in DuPage County divorce lawyer
When a couple chooses to get a divorce, the process of dividing marital assets is likely to cause some conflict. Each party may have personal attachments to certain properties, and while it is sometimes fairly straightforward to reach an agreement that satisfies each person’s needs and wishes, certain kinds of properties are especially complicated. When it comes to dividing these properties, it is helpful to have the guidance of an experienced attorney who can help you protect your interests and avoid financial losses.
3 Properties That May Cause Conflict During a Divorce
Typically, the properties that are hardest to divide are those that have the highest value and that both parties rely on. These may include:
- Retirement accounts: In Illinois, contributions to retirement accounts that were made during a marriage are usually considered marital property, even if the account is listed in one party’s name or funded through contributions from one party’s paycheck. The necessity of dividing a retirement account can affect both party’s retirement plans, and it can result in significant losses if you are not careful about how you divide it. Many retirement accounts must be divided in accordance with a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) to prevent early withdrawal penalties and other tax implications.
- The couple’s home: A home that you and your spouse shared during your marriage may be your most valuable marital asset, and it also often comes with strong emotional attachments, especially when you have children who feel secure in the home. Many couples try to arrange for one party to keep the home after the divorce, but it is important to keep in mind associated expenses like mortgage payments, utilities, and property taxes, in addition to the home’s value.
- Businesses: A business bought or founded by either spouse during the marriage is also usually considered property of the marital estate. If one party is more invested in the business and wishes to keep it in the divorce, he or she will likely have to give up other assets to achieve an equitable distribution. A family business in which both parties are involved can be even more complicated, as you may need to arrange for a buyout of one party’s share or determine whether it makes sense to remain co-owners and business partners.
Contact a DuPage County Property Division Attorney
If you are concerned about your property interests and the financial impact of your divorce, the attorneys at Mevorah & Giglio Law Offices can help. We will work with you to reach a fair resolution that prevents you from experiencing excessive hardship. Contact a Lombard, IL divorce lawyer for a free consultation at 630-755-6426.
Regardless of whether or not the decision to end your marriage is mutual, once the agreement to divorce has materialized, both parties can feel as if the worst part — the big decision — is over. However, the reality of divorce says otherwise. It is often the moments leading up to, and those immediately after the litigation process, that can sneak up and cause conflict. Couples who have managed to remain civil and those who are experiencing existing tension have the opportunity to lessen the chances of a contentious divorce by looking for signs of underlying tension.
Signs Your Divorce May Take a Turn
While no two divorces look alike and every couple’s circumstances differ, the following signs are common red flags that may point to conflict on the horizon:
Custody Disputes - Anytime children are involved in a divorce, the emotions and stakes are always heightened. While many parents choose to find ways to cooperate with one another for the sake of the kids, the smallest of disagreements when it comes to parenting plans or parenting time can quickly take a turn for the worst. This is especially true if the reason for the divorce was particularly damaging, due to infidelity or an intimate betrayal of some sort. Be sure to address your concerns with your attorney if you or the other parent are beginning to lose your patience with one another in front of the children and you are noticing that you are not seeing eye to eye on parenting issues....
The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry (AACAP) reports that one out of every two marriages ends in divorce. Married couples hear these kinds of statistics often, but the challenges for divorcing parents do not truly become a reality until their marriage becomes a part of this statistic. For parents experiencing a high-conflict divorce, these challenges can be detrimental to the whole family, especially to the children.
How to Help Your Children During Divorce
The very nature of divorce makes the process difficult for everyone involved. Even the most amicable, peaceful separations can dig up many mixed emotions for the family. Much like other losses in life, divorce grief usually unravels in layers over time. Just when you think you may be out of the woods and on the road to healing, a simple memory or argument can trigger an emotional setback. Children who witness episodes of high conflict between their parents during their separation tend to suffer the most, but there are steps parents can take to lessen these negative effects, including:
Family therapists everywhere have a number of differing views on the effects of divorce, but one truth they collectively agree on is that the experience is both complex and unique for everyone. Some spouses experience a roller coaster of highs and lows or episodes of intense emotional trauma, while others feel a great sense of relief and waves of elation as they rediscover and reclaim the identity they feel they lost throughout their marriage. Wherever you fall on the emotional scale of divorce, one thing is certain: the journey is a complicated emotional process, and its aftermath will inevitably take a toll on you to some degree.
Various Layers of Loss
It is natural to have limited ability to predict and look ahead at your life post-divorce. It can be very difficult to anticipate how the changes that come with the end of your marriage will make you feel or what they will look like until you are actually facing them head-on. While not everyone experiences a negative, turbulent divorce, even those who undergo a mutual, peaceful split still come face-to-face with forms of grief they may have not considered in the early stages of the separation. You may underestimate the magnitude of the following losses after your divorce because you simply cannot fully prepare for the results:
Loss of mutual friends and shared social structures - Changes in your social circles and within your immediate and extended family may begin to happen even before your divorce is finalized. Mutual friends of you and your spouse, as well as close family members, often feel they must take sides or stay out of your business, which can sometimes lead to the complete severing of a relationship you once valued. This can be especially devastating if you have worked hard to cultivate special friendships over a long period of time. One way to address this is to talk to your shared friends during the divorce process, and if possible, discuss the topic with your spouse, so you can all work together to create a game plan that allows everyone to remain involved without animosity or awkwardness moving forward....
Parental guilt is exceedingly common among parents who get divorced, as many moms and dads struggle to overcome the feelings of remorse as they worry whether the choices they have made are what is best their child. Unfortunately, parents who succumb to such guilt can contribute to the manifestation of behavioral issues in their child, perhaps to the point where the child feels the need to comfort the parent. As a result, children in this type of situation may suffer from maladjustment during their developmental years. Thankfully, with an understanding of why parental guilt should be put into perspective, you may be able to avoid these issues and help your child get through the divorce process. Here are some tips that can help protect your child from the effects of divorce-related guilt:
Be honest - Your kids can tell that you feel bad about the divorce, but voicing your emotions out loud can put them in a difficult position where they may feel the need to protect your feelings. You will want to be thoughtful about how you word things. Do not apologize for splitting up with your spouse when you know it is the best option for your family. Instead, apologize for the pain that it is causing your child. This approach lets them know that their hurt is your hurt, and it encourages them to accept the changes for what they are.
Learn to manage difficult emotions - Grief, anxiety, and depression can become addicting. As strange as that sounds, the truth is that when you spend a long time being upset, you can actually begin to feel guilt about potential happiness. That feeling is often intensified if your child is in pain. However, your child is more likely to move forward and heal if they see that you are starting to seem happy. Even if you feel guilty or sad about your divorce, it is important to find ways to enjoy your new life....