For many spouses, the thought of a peaceful divorce is a definite oxymoron. With so many factors contributing to the conflicts that often plague the divorce process, it may seem almost impossible to imagine a marriage ending on friendly terms. Sensitive issues such as the division of debts, spousal support, and parenting time have the power to amplify emotions and create overwhelming tension in the midst of a separation. Working through these issues can be extremely challenging and painful, especially when interactions between parties are hostile. However, psychology experts tell us that a peaceful divorce is not a myth. Despite the fact that every divorce involves some level of loss, sadness, and hurt, it is possible to make it through the experience tranquilly and civilly.
Here are some suggestions for a smoother divorce experience:
Be respectful - When divorce circumstances are brought about by painful betrayals, it can be very difficult to summon the strength to remain respectful to your ex-spouse. Showing consistent respect throughout the proceedings, however, can benefit the whole family, especially when there are children involved. The more civil you are, the better chance you have of keeping the peace in the long run, as it encourages the other party to return the same behavior.
Team up - The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) suggests former partners collaborate and work together to reduce stress wherever possible. This is particularly healthy for any children you may share, as children do not typically handle conflict between parents well. For example, consider family therapy, and keep communication a priority. Experts also recommend identifying and agreeing on a common goal with your former partner. Discussing a goal that will be mutually beneficial is a good way to promote civility, and hopefully, maintain peaceful interaction between you for the duration of the divorce process.
Ask for help - Asking for professional help is another tip that experts unanimously recommend for remaining on good terms during a divorce. Whether you seek out the guidance of a family therapist to confront the emotional distress brought on by the separation or reach out to a skilled attorney who can assist you in your case, employing the help of a trained professional can make a huge difference in the outcome of your divorce experience. The AAMFT also suggests mediation as a means to handle the end of your marriage, which involves the assistance of a professional who acts as a third party in your case. A mediator can help address disagreements, diffuse tension, and negotiate solutions for ongoing conflicts.
No matter how prepared you think you are for divorce, no one escapes from the experience truly unscathed. Even ex-partners who remain on the best terms with one another run into disagreements. If you are in the midst of divorce conflicts that have stalled, take comfort in knowing there is a way to find a peaceful resolution. You can start by speaking with a qualified Bloomingdale divorce attorney and let a professional guide you the rest of the way. Call the Mevorah & Giglio Law Offices today at 630-932-9100 to schedule a free consultation.
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