As a parent, one of the many important decisions you will need to address during your divorce is how parenting time will be distributed between you and your spouse. Even in the most amicable of divorces when both parties are committed to their children’s best interests, shared parenting time can still be challenging to manage. However, you can take steps both during and after the divorce process to make it easier.

Suggestions for Successful Co-Parenting

Taking the following suggestions into consideration can help you create and maintain a parenting plan that works for everyone involved.

• Consider both parents’ schedules. A successful parenting plan allows both parents to maintain a strong relationship with their children. When determining the parenting time schedule, it is important to consider when each parent will be working or attending to other commitments so that both of you can make the most of the time you have with your kids.
• Plan ahead for important events. It is usually a good idea to account for certain special occasions, like holidays, birthdays, and school breaks, when creating your parenting plan. You may decide to alternate years between parents for each holiday, or divide time every year. It can also help to discuss with the other parent in advance of an important event in your child’s life that may not be addressed in your parenting plan, so that you can decide the best way for both of you to be involved.
• Commit to consistency and timely transitions. The time surrounding your divorce can be stressful and uncertain for your children, and maintaining a consistent schedule for them can help them feel more stable. Try to create a schedule that you can stick to, and make plans for transportation between households such that you are not cutting into the other parent’s allocated time.
• Be open to modifications. The parenting time schedule you create during your divorce may not always be viable as time goes on and your family’s routines and needs change. If you find that the current arrangement is not working, try to talk to the other parent about agreeing to a modification that suits both of your needs, and filing it with the court for approval.

Contact a DuPage County Parenting Time Attorney

At Mevorah Law Offices LLC, we have assisted many families with the creation of parenting plans, and we can work with you to help you reach an agreement on parenting time that protects the interests of you and your children. Contact an experienced Naperville family law attorney to request a free consultation at 630-420-1000.

If you are concerned about the possibility of a difficult divorce involving a long, stressful trial, you may be relieved to learn that many divorcing couples are able to reach an agreement through alternative dispute resolution (ADR) and avoid a protracted court battle. You may find that you and your spouse are able to communicate well enough to negotiate an agreement on your own, or that you benefit from the services of a neutral, third-party mediator to guide the conversation. Regardless of the approach you choose, achieving your desired outcome through ADR still requires that you go into the process fully prepared. 

Tips for Getting Ready for Alternative Dispute Resolution

Before you enter negotiations with your spouse or any other form of ADR, you should be sure that you know what to expect and that you have a plan for how to approach the conversation. All of the following can help you make the most of ADR:

• Consult with your attorney: Although your goal may be to avoid a trial, that does not mean there is no use for an attorney. A knowledgeable lawyer can help you understand the different options for ADR to determine whether one may be right for you, and can also help you protect your interests throughout the negotiation process.
• Understand the issues to be addressed: There are common issues that most couples need to address during the divorce process, including the division of marital assets and debts, the determination of parental responsibilities and parenting time if you have minor children, and any necessary orders for child support or spousal support payments. You should work with your attorney to understand how each of these decisions can affect you so that none of them catch you by surprise during negotiations.
• Determine your priorities: Going into ADR with goals in mind can help you stay focused.  You might decide that your priority is your children’s best interests, or that your goal is to maintain ownership of certain assets or make the case for spousal maintenance. As negotiations proceed, look for opportunities to compromise that may make your spouse more likely to agree with what you want.
• Adopt the right mindset: Know that ADR usually only works if both partners are willing to cooperate and commit to productive, civil communication. Do your best to leave emotions out of your negotiations and focus on the facts, and resist the urge to lash out at your spouse if the situation becomes tense.

Contact a DuPage County Divorce Attorney

At Mevorah Law Offices LLC, we strive to help you resolve your divorce using an approach that works best for you and your family. When your goal is to keep conflict to a minimum and reach a cooperative agreement, we can advise you throughout the process of alternative dispute resolution to help make this possible. Contact a Lombard, IL family law attorney at 630-755-6426 for a free consultation.

If you are getting married at a point in your life when you already have significant assets or children from a previous marriage, a prenuptial agreement can provide you with important protections in the event your marriage fails. However, the hardest part of getting a prenuptial agreement may be raising the subject with your partner in the first place. You can make the conversation easier if you are careful about how you approach it.

Tips for Talking About a Prenuptial Agreement

If you are not careful, your partner may view your request for a prenuptial agreement as a sign that you do not trust him or her, or that you expect the marriage to fail. In order to assuage these fears, here are some suggestions that can lead to a more positive discussion.

• Include your request in a larger conversation about finances. Marriage means that you and your spouse will share at least some financial assets and debts, so it is in the best interest of any couple to discuss finances openly before deciding to get married. As you start to learn more about each other’s financial needs and goals, you may find a good opportunity to raise the subject of a prenuptial agreement.
• Explain your reasoning. When you ask your partner about creating a prenuptial agreement, do your best to make it clear why it is so important to you. If your partner understands your desire to provide for your children or retain control over a business in which you have invested significant time and energy, he or she may be more open to supporting your needs.
• Be open to your partner’s needs and concerns. At the same time, make an effort to listen to and understand your partner’s concerns. You may need to reassure your partner of your love and commitment, but you should also be open to his or her requests for terms in the agreement that protect his or her own interests.
• Do not put it off. A request for a prenuptial agreement weeks before your marriage is likely to raise more red flags than a request as soon as possible after your engagement, or even before it. Giving your partner an opportunity to process your request is one of the best ways to ensure that it does not lead to conflict.

It may also help to let your partner know that in Illinois, a prenuptial agreement can be modified at any time as long as both partners agree. However, under no circumstances should you attempt to manipulate, coerce, or force your partner into signing a prenuptial agreement, as any of these behaviors can make the agreement invalid, not to mention the damage that such actions could cause in your relationship.

In many marriages, an imbalance in income means that one spouse relies on the other for financial support to maintain their accustomed standard of living. When these marriages end in divorce, it can be especially hard for the lower-income spouse to recover financially. Thankfully, Illinois courts will often award spousal support or maintenance in these cases, but it is important to note that this is usually not a permanent solution. If you rely on spousal support, you should be aware of the circumstances under which those payments can end and plan accordingly.

Standard Duration of Spousal Support in Illinois

If the court determines that spousal maintenance is necessary, the duration of payment is typically calculated based on the length of the marriage, starting at 20 percent of the length of the marriage for marriages shorter than 5 years. For example, a marriage of 4 years would result in 9 to 10 months of spousal support. The duration increases by 4 percent of the length of the marriage for each additional year up to 20, at which point the court may award spousal support for a period equal to the entire length of the marriage or indefinitely.

If you are the spouse receiving support, understanding these calculations can help you make plans for increasing your personal income in the future, perhaps by continuing your education or seeking new career opportunities so that you can fully support yourself by the time the payments terminate.

After your divorce is finalized, you may be looking for a fresh start, perhaps in the form of a change of scenery. However, if you share children with your ex, relocating after your divorce is not as simple as picking a spot on the map. You should think carefully about whether the move is in your children’s best interests, and even if you decide that relocation is the right decision, there are important procedures you must follow to ensure your relocation is legal.

Possible Reasons for Relocation

Moving with your children after a divorce is a major decision that affects your entire family. However, there are situations in which it may make sense. For example, relocation can be a good decision if:

• The move allows you to better provide for your children. You may have a good case for relocation if you are moving to accept a job offer that advances your career and increases your income, or to pursue higher education that increases your job opportunities.
• The move allows you or your children to pursue an important opportunity. If the reason for your move is directly related to your children, perhaps to allow them to attend a better school or participate in a cherished extracurricular activity, you may have a good case that the move is in your children’s best interests.
• The move brings you closer to extended family. Relocating closer to your family not only gives your children the opportunity to build stronger relationships with them, but may also give you access to a better support system that can assist in the raising of your children.
• Your children are able to maintain their relationship with the other parent. Presuming that your ex is a fit parent, it is important that your relocation does not damage your children’s relationship with him or her. If you choose to move, you should work with your ex to update your parenting plan and arrange for regular travel so that your kids can still spend time with both of you.

Obtaining Approval for Relocation in Illinois

If you plan to move with your child out of state or at least 25 from your current home (50 miles, if you already live outside of the immediate Chicago area), you will likely need to obtain legal approval to do so. First, you must provide reasonable written notice to the other parent, usually at least 60 days before the move. From there, the best-case scenario is that your ex consents to the relocation and is willing to work with you on an updated parenting plan. However, if your ex does not consent, you will need to file a petition for relocation and demonstrate to the court that the move is in your children’s best interests.