Whether you have just begun the process of initiating divorce proceedings or are in the early stages of contemplating ending your marriage, imagining what your life will look and feel like when you are on your own again can be emotionally crippling. It is not uncommon for couples to remain in relationship limbo for that exact reason — the idea of living alone can be overwhelming, to say the least. Thankfully, the decision to move forward and take the next step into your newly single life can also be a prime opportunity to nurture yourself in ways you may have never done before. An experienced divorce attorney can assist you with the legal steps of ending your marriage so you can focus on reinventing yourself.
Psychology experts remind us that people often lose themselves in relationships, so it is not surprising how challenging the task of figuring out how to live alone can be following a divorce. As you take a leap into what feels like the great unknown, practice the following tips to help yourself prepare and adjust to your new life:
Make your living space your sanctuary: Once you are no longer living with your married partner, your home environment is more important than ever before. Whether you have plans to remain in the home you both shared or you intend to start fresh and move to a brand-new apartment in another city, ensure that your space makes you feel comfortable, safe, and peaceful. Make your home your sanctuary, a refuge from the outside world. Redecorate as much as it is financially feasible, especially if you are staying in the same home. If you are relocating, unpack your boxes and make the place feel lived in, so you feel as if you are establishing roots. This will also allow you to relax and feel a new sense of belonging.
Venture out into your community: Whether you are in a new neighborhood or remain in the same community, socializing and getting involved around town can help you further establish a sense of home and belonging apart from your spouse. Challenge yourself little by little to get out and volunteer at a local church or food bank. Choose a new favorite coffee house to make a part of your routine, where you can enjoy some time to yourself and strike up a conversation with the locals. Psychologists suggest thinking of your community as an extension of your physical residence; your home is not merely your street address.
Reconnect with your dreams, values, and interests: Living as a single person again, even when sharing your home with your children or a roommate, often leads us to ruminate over the loss of the marriage. This can cause us to dwell on your grief and memories of the relationship. Dwelling in turn can cause us to feel stuck, and before we know it, we feel helpless and forget about the power we have to move forward. As you begin life without your spouse, take this time as an opportunity to reconnect with the interests and activities that make you who you are — reprioritize and regroup. Chances are, you dropped off some of those interests and values somewhere along the way during the time you were married. You can feel empowered during this emotionally fragile time by reminding yourself of the things that bring you joy and by rediscovering your true priorities in life.
Anyone contemplating divorce is bound to experience anxiety and concern over thoughts of the future without his or her spouse. As you navigate these emotionally trying times, reach out to a competent, seasoned Naperville divorce attorney, who can handle all of the legal aspects of your divorce, and offer guidance along the way. Call our team of dedicated lawyers at Mevorah Law Offices LLC today at 630-755-6426 and schedule a personal consultation.
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