Facing an impending divorce can raise multiple concerns for both parties, especially when special circumstances arise that can further complicate the process. Arguments over parenting time or the inability to agree on other crucial issues, such as property division and alimony, are just a few examples of problems that often surface between a divorcing couple. Financial matters, in particular, are a major landmine for many separating spouses, as months or years of shared investments, purchases, and accounts have accumulated and must now be divided. Monetary concerns do not necessarily have to increase the tension between you and your spouse, however. Preparation is key to sorting out financial decisions during your divorce. 

Creating a Foundation for Financial Negotiations 

Even if you have not had the time to take stock of your finances before pursuing a divorce, there are still plenty of steps you can take that can provide a clearer picture of what you are working with, what your challenges will be moving forward, and how you can stay organized throughout the divorce process. The following tips can help tackle monetary issues that may be associated with your divorce:

• Create a financial snapshot - The most vital part of addressing finances in a divorce is taking stock of what you are working with in terms of accounts, debts, and investments. Create a list of every account you have - both joint and separate - and total up your assets and debts. Do not forget to include any insurance policies you share, as well as real estate deeds, wills, or trusts. Initially, it may be overwhelming to take a hard look at the bulk of the financial obligations and investments you and your spouse share, but once you have taken inventory, you will have a starting point to work from.

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Predicting the types of conflicts you may experience throughout your divorce process can be difficult, if not impossible. Sometimes, you do not know trouble is brewing until a particular issue is discussed and suddenly spawns an argument that seems unmanageable. Many couples experience nothing but smooth sailing during the first stages of divorce, only to find later that buried tensions have morphed into a series of toxic interactions. Whether you have been fortunate enough to have an amicable separation thus far or are dealing with a contentious divorce, exploring mediation as a tool to help achieve a peaceful dissolution of marriage can be beneficial for both parties. 

Conflicts That Can Be Better Resolved With Mediation 

Divorce stirs up an array of emotions for everyone involved, often triggering irrational exchanges and heated responses between both parties. If tension starts to build or conversations cannot be conducted civilly, mediation may be the best resolution. Utilizing a trained professional to negotiate the terms of your divorce can help reduce stress, allowing you to reach an agreement that both parties can be satisfied with. Some common points of dispute that can be resolved with the help of a mediator include:

• Parenting plan disagreements - The purpose of a parenting plan in the state of Illinois is to allocate specific parental responsibilities to each parent, so that both parties have a clear understanding of their role in the child’s life. Although a parenting plan serves to protect the best interests of the child, creating one can be tricky. Disagreements about important issues, such as parenting time (visitation), education, healthcare, and religious beliefs, can be resolved through mediation.

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If you share children with your spouse and have made the choice to divorce, one of the most important legal decisions you and your partner will have to make is which guidelines to include in your parenting plan. Under Illinois law, a parenting plan is a written agreement that designates certain decision-making responsibilities to each parent, outlining specific parameters that provide structure as to how children should be raised. Parenting plans also govern parenting time (visitation), which is a crucial piece of your family’s new structure following the divorce.

Responsibilities to be Discussed When Creating a Parenting Plan

With so many points to cover in your new parental dynamic, the details can be overwhelming to sort out, especially if there is tension between you and the other parent. If you are unsure of where to begin or what will be expected of you as a divorcing parent, familiarizing yourself with the responsibilities that will be allocated can help you organize your thoughts and concerns. Here are some foundational caretaking functions that will be addressed in a parenting plan:

• Daily routines - Your children’s daily routines must be maintained, including bedtime and wake-up time, general hygiene practices, and mealtimes. In addition, children must be supervised at all times.

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The moment a couple decides to end their marriage, both spouses may face what feels like an endless list of challenges, especially if children are involved. Divorcing parents must address an entirely new set of concerns as they begin to navigate through different family structures and dynamics after the separation. Moving through the divorce process with children in the picture can be especially daunting, even for parents who are able to interact on a positive and productive level. The range of emotions experienced can be amplified in the wake of additional changes, such as relocation after the divorce.

Relieving Children’s Stress

No matter how amicable the decision to separate may be, it is inevitable for everyone involved to feel saddened by the dissolution of their family unit to some degree. For children who are used to living in the same home with both parents, it can be difficult for them to suddenly move. Deciding to relocate as a newly divorced parent is far from easy, but under certain circumstances, it may be necessary. Psychology experts report that the negative effects of divorce on children can be limited, depending on the other factors that are involved. Research shows that parents have the power to limit the extent of psychological harm to their kids after the divorce by choosing words and actions that support their children’s best interests. 

As you begin to navigate the divorce process, the tasks you must face can seem daunting. It is natural to feel overwhelmed by what likely seems to be a never-ending to-do list, but the upside to this challenge is that the more organized you are, the more you improve your chances of experiencing a smoother, less stressful divorce from start to finish. If you and your spouse share children, topics such as the allocation of parental responsibilities (child custody) and parenting time (visitation) can be especially taxing as you organize the next chapter of your lives, as these topics tend to be highly emotional for both parties. However, a thorough parenting plan will help better facilitate your post-divorce parenting arrangements and ultimately support your child’s best interests.

The Minimum Requirements for Your Parenting Plan

A parenting plan in the state of Illinois is, in essence, an outline of each parent’s responsibilities included in your divorce decree. It acts as a rulebook with clear guidelines for both parents, so each party knows what is expected of them moving forward. To ensure your arrangements are as efficient as possible and serve to protect the well-being of your children after the separation, it is important that your plan covers all the basics. Your attorney will assist in negotiating the terms and can help direct and advise you in the revision of any details or areas that need to be addressed, but every parenting plan should at least touch on the following three issues: